My Way IS The Highway

It's always a crap shoot deciding whether to stay on I-88 or take side streets when it looks clogged off in the distance. All too often, I choose the side streets (which run parallel to the highway) and realize that the clog was only temporary - likely some amateur braking too hard for no reason.

On my way home from work every evening, the two left lanes become blocked ("open road tolling" my ass) and the right lane is usually clear. It seems to happen frequently that there will only be one car in front of me in the right lane and as soon as the left and middle lanes hit the brakes, so does that one car. Ahead of the one car is a CLEAR LANE as far as the eye can see. If he doesn't brake, we have clear sailing for nearly a mile while everyone else inches along. Alas, he always hits the brakes allowing tons of cars from the middle lane to dive into my freedom.

Lesson here: on the highway, if you don't see a problem, don't hit the brakes if there's no real reason. In fact, I find that as many times as not, acceleration is a better solution than braking. Rather than get mucked up in a bad spot, why not get clear of it? Leave it behind you. When I see a wide open lane, I hit the gas.

Also, I know that none of my friends would do this, but if you're seeing cars passing you, make sure you're in the right lane. DO NOT ride in the left lane and force people to pass you on the right.

And finally, when entering a highway, you should be hitting the gas AS SOON AS YOU'RE ON THE RAMP - not when you finally get on the highway. I do not understand why people go 25-30 MPH all the way down the relatively straight, downhill ramp onto I-88 when there are cars and trucks barreling along at 65-80 MPH. This is important: if you're merging onto the highway, you do not have a right to a lane. You have to fit into the flow of traffic and the best way is to be going near the speed of the cars already there. It only makes sense. If this is too much to think about, DO NOT TAKE THE HIGHWAY. I'll be happy to map out some side streets for you. I mean it.

Now, I'm not claiming that any of this is legally founded or sanctioned by the state of Illinois, but I am warning you that any infractions of the above suggestions might result in a Saturn Vue up your butt.